Sunday, May 11, 2014

Mothers Day weekend and the reason(s) none of my clothes fit.

Happy Mother's Day to this lady! We've always been too cool for school.

This weekend has been a whirlwind of crazy busy fun running in circles. Let's start with Friday morning. 

Listen, I know that eating clean is better for your overall health. A great deal of the time, I really enjoy that. I love getting all those good fruits and veggies in my meals. But y’all – McDonalds is DELICIOUS. Starting Friday off with a bacon egg and cheese biscuit, grape jelly, and a Dr. Pepper? Positively priceless. And that is why, for the remainder of my life, I've made a deal with the devil. I've traded my abs for a soft spot around the middle. #ohwell

I didn't know it at the time, but my early morning Mickey D's would set the meal precedent for the entire day. Scratch that. Entire weekend. 

It all started with work snacks. These were leftover from a baby shower on Wednesday and it's been problematic ever since.

If you've never had a club cracker, I don't even know where to start with you. All you really need to know is that I'm positive the two main ingredients are crack and crisco. They are buttery and fabulous and that's really all you need to be happy.

Then when your boss walks up to your desk at noon and says, "Let's go to lunch!" the truth is you really have no choice but to say yes. You know, for your career's sake. A half rack of ribs and a slice of buttermilk pie later, my food baby showed up. It's been here ever since.

I wish I could say it stopped there, but we are only just beginning my friends.

Work has been crazy since the wedding. So once the week is over, these types of celebrations are more necessary than optional.

And if you give a girl a beer, she's going to want to order some chicken strips. ("If you give a girl a beer" is the working title of a new children's book I'm currently working on. What do you think?)

I wish I could tell you that the coolness of the night just kept on going. But the fact of the matter is we were back home, and in bed by 9:15. And that, my friends, is what I call a successful Friday night.

Saturday morning I managed to sleep in until 7, another huge success. Then I headed out to Dallas to start off this Mother's Day weekend with none other than the woman who birthed me. 

My mom's present this year was a girl's day at the Swiss Avenue Tour of Homes in Dallas. 

We spent a few hours touring some GORGEOUS basically mansions homes in the beautiful Swiss Avenue historic district. 

Because oogling over unattainable homes is what we do best. 

Fancy homes, where pretentious booties are necessary. Don't worry, none of the dirt from my $15 Target sandals rubbed off on the imported rugs. 

Massive homes and fancy closets. My life is complete. 

Also, I need my home covered in this wallpaper. STAT.

We ooh'd and ahh'd our way through half of the homes before we decided we were hot sweaty and STARVING. So we stopped for pizza. I am my mother's daughter, y'all.

After some solid mother-daughter time, we parted ways and I spent the next few hours hanging out Dallas with THIS GIRL! We didn't take a picture so I'm forced to use this one that we took a couple of weeks ago. But, yes, we are always this put together. 

We hung out for a few hours, until it was time to head to Chuy's. Why you ask? Oh, just to celebrate the fact that THIS GIRL JUST GOT ENGAGED!

Emily and Brent have been together for NINE years! Their love story is perfect and they are the sweetest couple you will ever meet. Em, I am SO EXCITED FOR YOU!! And I can't wait to dance my ass off at your wedding!

Sunday morning I slept in until 8:15 (whoa, I know) and then I got busy grocery shopping, cleaning, and getting ready for Mother's Day lunch. Oh, these ladies.

And a little bit o' this. Or a lot o' bit.

And the new fam :)

Oh, what a weekend. Lessons learned? 

1) My wedding bouquet was magical.

2) YOLO.

3) Fancy houses are nice, but a tiny one bedroom apartment with this guy is the perfect home for me.

 4) And Moms are the best.



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